if it’s news to me, it must be news to you!
Rickroller of the week: Worse than plagiarising the words of Michelle Obama, Melania Trump was also guilty of Rickrolling when she said of Donald that: ‘He will never, ever give up, and he will never, ever let you down’.
Bargain of the week: A rare Star Wars Boba Fett figure sold for £26,000 at auction which beats the previous record of £18,000 for another Boba Fett figure sold last year.
Plain speaker of the week: Judge Peter Thornton who has told coroners to use plain English after one asked a jury to determine ‘the polarity of the dichotomy’ during a case in Kent.
Cartoon of the week: By Peter Brookes in The Times (right), with apologies to the BFG, but none to Jeremy Corbyn. And I don’t think the cartoonist’s first thought was ‘feckless’.
Game-player of the week: Orangutans at Melbourne Zoo enjoy nothing more than playing video games on their Xbox. Not sure if this tells us more about the intelligence of apes or the average teenager.
Fashion victims: Wearing high heels can damage your vocal chords, according to the expert who gave evidence to a parliamentary committee. Worse still, they can also impair your thinking and damage your career.
Free beer tomorrow: A two-mile-long pipeline opens in Bruges in September to carry 1,500 gallons an hour from the brewery to the bottling plant. The project to protect the streets from traffic was crowdfunded with the promise of free beer for life for the donors.
Never a crossword: A 91-year-old woman obeyed the instruction on a £67,000 work of modern art and completed the blanks in the crossword-based piece in biro.
My name is…: No it really is Michael Caine since the actor finally dropped Maurice Micklewhite at the age of 82 because he was fed-up having to explain the apparent discrepancy on his passport.
Brief lives: Garry Marshall writer of The Odd Couple and Mork and Mindy; King Coal Richard Budge; Prince Alexander of Yugoslavia, born in a London hotel room supposedly designated Yugoslavian territory for the event; Les Stocker who created Europe’s first wildlife teaching hospital; Elizabeth Harrison, the German Jew who fled Germany to join the French Resistance.